Bare Naked Daddy

by Sierra on November 23, 2009

in humor, parenting

There aren’t actually any naked Daddy’s in this post. This is ChildWild’s first ever guest post, writting by my much adored and long-suffering husband. The title is his, as is the tale.

Reason #4769 why I married this man: after writing this, he came home and folded a pile of laundry the size of a baby elephant. We all have sweaters again! And socks! Love.

Rio [white-faced and blue-lipped from bike trailer ride without sweater]: I am not going to play outside, Daddy [at kindergarten dropoff, morning choice]

Teacher: Rio, aren’t you cold without a sweater?

Rio:  I couldn’t find a sweater this morning.

Teacher: Hm, somehow I find that hard to believe…

Rio:   Well…

Daddy: (Uh-oh…)

Rio: … I went down to the kitchen wearing only my shirt and socks and said “Daddy, is it OK to go to school like this?”, and he said “No”, so I went  through my clothes box in the changing table and got a pair of pants and went upstairs to get a sweater, but I looked aaaall over the laundry pile and there was nothing there, and then I looked in all my drawers but there were only two sweaters, one that didn’t fit me and another which was only for the summer.

Daddy: (Swallow me Earth. Worst Dad ever…)

Teacher [uncomfortably entangled in our dirty laundry...]:  Oh.

Remind me never to forget to have her school clothes ready the night before…

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Sesame Street iPhone App: Not for Sharing

by Sierra on November 22, 2009

in Uncategorized

I reviewed the new Sesame Street iPhone app over at Strollerderby yesteday. I think my sweetie put it well when he looked over my shoulder and said, “I cannot imagine anything less interesting.”

But we’re adults. This thing is toddler crack. Serena was ready to give new meaning to the phrase “killer app” by murdering her sister over whose turn it was to hold the device.

After I’d confiscated their toy my phone, I “interviewed” Rio about the game. This is what she said:

Me: Did you like the Sesame Street game?

Rio: Yes!

Me: What did you like about it?

Rio: You tip the phone and make food. I just liked it.

Me: Would you recommend it to other kids?

Rio: NO! I would not reco…um…rec…um…no.

Me: Why not?

Rio: Because they would not share.

She went on at some length about how some two-year-olds, and she’s not naming any names, do not know how to share iPhone games and absolutely cannot be trusted to play them. But, she allowed as how some five-year-olds are very good with iPhone games and incidentally she is free tomorrow afternoon if, and I quote, “You want to make it your choice sometime to go to the cafe and have quiet work time, I could go with you to the cafe and that would be a good time for me to play that Sesame Street game on your phone. I am free tomorrow to do that.”

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Weekly Link Round-Up

November 21, 2009

Since I’m writing for several websites now, I’m going to post a weekly round-up here for folks playing along from home. This is two weeks worth, because I got a late start. Enjoy!
Here are my favorite pieces:
Hospital Rejects Birth Plans
How to Buy Carbon Offsets That Count
Dads Detained, Banned from Wal-Mart for Shopping While Gay
Top 5 [...]

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Sometimes you just have to jump in the leaves

November 20, 2009

It’s been a great season for leaf jumping: dry, warm, mostly sunny. The leaves pile up in big gold drifts of fun. And the kids pile into them, like kids do. Love it!

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Birthday Rum Spiced with 21 Hot Peppers

November 17, 2009

Bridget’s dad had a birthday party over the weekend. I helped him celebrate by drinking rum spiced with 21 hot peppers. That was even better than I thought it would be, and I thought it was worth walking across town for.
Dead simple recipe:

Grow little hot red peppers all summer.
Watch them ripen.
Harvest them.
put them in a [...]

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Creative doll repair or Pocket Bondage Princess?

November 12, 2009

I came downstairs today to find this in Serena’s hand. She was cooing over her precious ‘daughter’. Serena is obsessed with these little dolls. Their heads break off easily and can’t be reattached via normal means.
Serena refuses to give up on the dolls, and keeps presenting their parts to her daddy saying, “Fix! Fix! Tools!”
Apparently [...]

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Strollerderby, Hospital rejects birth plans

November 11, 2009

I’ve just joined the staff at Strollerderby, the “mother of all parenting blogs”. One of my first articles, “Hospital Rejects Birth Plans”, has started a little comments riot over there.
To whit: A hospital in Provo, UT, has posted a sign telling women that if they want a birth plan, a doula or a Bradley birth, [...]

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You ate the bride’s bouquet?!

November 11, 2009

Last month, while the world celebrated World Food Day, I attended a good friend’s wedding, and, with help from the rest of the wedding party, raucously ate the bride’s bouquet.
Eating her bouquet? My friend, concerned about the environmental impact of the cut flower industry, carried a beautiful bunch of flowering kale down the aisle. She [...]

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Brigid, healthy happy and growing

November 10, 2009

It’s been a few weeks since I posted about Bridget, the baby whose birth I attended a little over a month ago.
Everyone’s warm wishes and prayers were abundantly answered. Bridget is home with her family, nursing and growing and looking at shadows and lights. She is in every respect entirely like a healthy new [...]

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Not quite “Non-Consumption”

November 9, 2009

I posted recently at Wise Bread about “frugality fatigue”, the idea that Americans are tired of being frugal and breaking out their wallets for a little party time.
I might resemble those remarks. In the past few months, I’ve bought:

The car.
The first new bras I’ve bought since my last baby was born. They’re five cup sizes [...]

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